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I walked around with a silver Sharpie in my pocket for days. Around the stage, around the auditorium, around the catwalk. It took time and nerve and tears to finally write Cooper’s name in our new space, but it is done. The spring musical—our first production in the new performing arts center—wrapped a week ago.Continue reading “On Silver Sharpies and Secret Spots”

It’s been a pretty good few days in my world. Logan, Son #1, moved back to Illinois after almost nine years in Michigan. Now he and Cass are in a tidy three-hour line; he is the halfway point. I foresee birthday lunches and just-because visits instead of twice-or-thrice-yearly visits. He and Cass can overlap lives.Continue reading “On Catwalk Autographs”

Valentine’s Day. Sugar-fueled teenagers. Weird weather. Construction delays. Formal evaluation. Rehearsal. Equipment scavenger hunt. Rush, rush, rush. Adulting seems extreme, doesn’t it? I left rehearsal as soon as notes finished, and hustled (as much as Tonya hustles) through the hallways and back to my classroom to collect what I needed to bring home and leaveContinue reading “On Sunset Rainbows”

I had to do a TV interview this week. I love the reason for the interview—showing off our nearly-finished auditorium—but I didn’t love the interview itself. If you know me, you already know I’m thoroughly uncomfortable in front of the camera. I prefer to submit my answers in writing and avoid video altogether. Alas, thatContinue reading “On Stage”

Apparently, it’s only Tuesday evening—not even bedtime for the above-toddler crowd. It feels later in the day and in the week. Thursday, at least. We all have days that just don’t go right. Nothing horribly wrong (until supper, but that’s later), but nothing super-duper right, either. And, if you’re living in a skin like mine,Continue reading “On Broccoli and Bedtime”

On her fifth birthday, dripping wet from playing in the sprinkler, my always-running daughter slipped and fell, bounced her head off the kitchen floor, knocked herself out, and had a seizure. It was terrifying. Cass is the youngest of three kids; by the time she turned five, everyone had been stitched up by our belovedContinue reading “On Birthday Concussions and Pussyfooting”

Christmas morning more than 20 years ago: Cooper is trying out his new hunting/wilderness PlayStation game when he begins shouting, “Polar bear, polar bear, POLAR BEAR!” at the TV and belly crawling backward across the living room floor. He keeps playing the game until he reaches the limit of the controller’s cord. From that momentContinue reading “On Polar Bears and Pajamas”

I see the posts—the hopeful, joyful, optimistic posts—filling my Facebook feed. I see the well-wishes and promises, the goals and memories, the lingering warm-fuzzies of the holiday season mixed with the possibilities of another January 1st. I see it all, but I feel very little. Instead, I find myself wondering. I wonder . . .Continue reading “On A New Year”

Please read this post as an explanation—a plea for understanding—and not a pity party. This time of year is so difficult for so many. I speak only for myself, yet I know I’m not alone in my feelings. Last night . . . Tonight, I’m sequestered in what is now My Craft Room. It wasContinue reading “On Wanting To Want To”

Most of my high school friends can still remember where they were the morning of Saturday, March 21, 1987. I was at an early-morning babysitting job and had gone back to sleep; my charges weren’t yet awake. Thirty-five years later, I can hear my mom’s murmurs downstairs—something was clearly wrong for her to have shownContinue reading “On This Rough Day and Some Great Kids”