Author Archives: Wizard Woodsy

As I was leaving our local Out of the Darkness walk in September, my first walk, I thanked the organizer for her work. Her response? “My heart is full.” She’s a fellow survivor mom; she organized the first walk shortly after her son’s death by suicide. I didn’t really understand how she could be contentContinue reading “On Sacred Space and a Full Heart”

In the grand scheme of church traditions, this “living cross” of Easter morning is relatively new, but it’s one of my favorites. This is one tradition that isn’t more painful after Cooper’s death; I loved it before and I love it now. Period. Here’s how it works: congregants bring flowers and we decorate a bareContinue reading “On Redbud Branches and the Long Way Home”

Today was a good Monday. Today was a good day. I’ve been planning to form a local chapter of The Compassionate Friends (TCF) since last year and have been actively working toward that goal since February, when I met TCF’s time-removed-from-loss requirement of 18 months. The process stalled for over a month, but last week’sContinue reading “On a Good Monday and Red Hairs”

So often since Cooper’s death, and more frequently in recent months, I’ve felt I should do something–anything–to eke some good from our tragedy. Nothing will make his death good; that’s an absurd thought. But can I use his death for good? Working on it. An overwhelming number of people donated to memorials, either to ourContinue reading “On Doing Something”

SO BREATHE, MAMA,Keep breathingBELIEVE, MAMAKeep believingFIGHT, MAMAKeep fighting for this truth to uprootthe lies in yourheart — you didn’tfail.Not even a little.From You are the Mother of All Mothers, by Angela Miller Last fall, near the first anniversary of Cooper’s death, a friend gifted me the book You are the Mother of All Mothers, byContinue reading “On Searching”

I knew the training could be tough—the topic was “Common Mental Health Disorders in Schools.” So yes, there was potential. The day’s speaker had presented to our teachers earlier in the year and I’d benefited from what he had to say, so I talked myself up, stocked a pencil bag with colored pens (yes, really),Continue reading “On Doodles, Notes, and Honesty”

A royal blue cap from a cheap water bottle. Trash, really. But last week, that bottle cap sent me into a panic; I thought I knew where it was, but I was wrong. After a brief-but-chaotic search, I found the cap in a perfectly safe, moderately reasonable location. A water bottle cap. Big whoop. ThoseContinue reading “On Caps”

Most of my life has been measured in school years, whether as a student, parent, college student and parent at the same time, or teacher. In that one way, I suppose this year is no different. We are entering 4th quarter of a year that has managed to trudge by in a blur. I’m noContinue reading “On School Years and Questions”

This week will be 18 months of After. For most, Thursday will be just another day, and I suppose in some ways, it’ll be just another day for me, too. I’ll go to work (lacking a snow day) and I’ll go to rehearsal. We will have class discussions, vocab practice, and all the business ofContinue reading “On Nests”

There’s a meme that keeps surfacing in some online groups that says “Grief lasts longer than sympathy.” Maybe I’m misunderstanding the sentiment, but it feels like the author would like sympathy to last longer. Not me. Not sympathy. Empathy? Yes. Acceptance? Yes. Patience? If you have it to spare. Not sympathy, though. In my worldContinue reading “On Sympathy & Swimming”